It’s been a very challenging few weeks both personally and professionally. I am being very mindful about managing this so I don’t sink again.
It is also the one year anniversary of the time that my Mental Health really started to play up. Looking back I’m very proud I acted on my Mental Health first aid training, engaging family,friends I trusted to do something about it.
As I’ve mentioned on a previous blog post I experienced burnout, this took over six months to form a plan to get myself well again. It involved interactions with doctors, my charity, family and friends.
But it’s not until a recent post on our Peer Support group that I started thinking about what a support network actually is. I always assumed it was related directly with people, and the post made me really question what effective support looks like?
The more I thought about it the more I realised it didn’t always have to be about having human support. I spend a lot of time outdoors interacting with nature on my own. When you start looking closer there are lots of ways to get help from the outdoors and what is around you. But first of all you need to identify places that you are comfortable being in. Over the last few weeks I’ve been fascinated by bees, the way that they work together to survive and produce one of the most remarkable things which is honey. There is some incredible YouTube content out there but you can dig deep into this. Then actually going out and watching them function is fascinating. I had to reassure my wife that I wasn’t going to get a beehive in the garden! But seriously these are remarkable creatures and we just take them for granted.
I put together this little video whilst there was sat reflecting and it might be of use to somebody. I think sometimes spending time exploring these things can actually open up different levels of support for you.
What is a support network?
Seven years ago I started a small litter picking group to cover the nature trails behind my house. The more I did this the more I saw the benefits of it, I created a Facebook group and I realise that I wasn’t the only one out there that appreciated the way that the nature trails supported our mental health. This is now grown into a community of nearly 8000 people, all appreciating what’s on their doorstep. The group has created a place of safety for many, a place where horse riders can talk with runners, parents can talk with each other and sadly local county line drug dealers can use it to avoid the police! A support network has been created for me out of nothing, through this I can use the environment, people I meet, the changing weather, just to share beauty as a way of recharging my batteries. It is a place of safety where I can exercise, observe, question and reflect – a very important support network outdoors.
I’d like to encourage you to think about what your support networks are and whether for you they are provided by other people or something else.
I’d love to hear you thoughts on this. Post in comments if you want to share.
I’ve been swamped with meetings, funerals and events for the past few days. It’s rather striking when you consider how much of our lives is shaped by the people we meet, but also just how hard saying goodbye is.
This is Peter Payne, a man who has been a significant part of my life for many years… and sadly, he passed away a few weeks ago.
Peter was such a fantastic boss and later became a wonderful friend. He and his wife Sue were truly legends in Youth Work in Buckinghamshire and then Milton Keynes. I stayed working with Peter for many years because he really helped me shine as a Youth worker. Even when I moved on we started a charity for Romanian orphans in the early nineties together, which led to him visiting Romania many times with me and the team. It was remarkable we never had any cross words just kind encouragement and professional leadership.
The Youth Project I worked in was a challenging one on a London overspill estate and this is where I met Dale Caffrey, who became an inspiration for us to set up our charity. My co-founder Jay Lucas was Dale’s friend.
Jay is a really good friend now. Without him, the charity would not have started. After Dale’s suicide and funeral where I made the promise to do something to stop other families going through the pain of suicide, we met together, and we researched and came up with the idea and plan for Mental Health Motorbike. We both invested so much time into coming up with a plan that would be achievable and needed. I’ve known Jay since he was a little boy, and now he’s living in Portugal with his wife Charlotte, and they are again doing amazing work out there.
So who else did I meet … first of all, Kelly, what an awesome individual. Again, school friends with Jay and Dale. Now working at Falconhurst School looking after the SEN children. The room lights up when you meet Kelly and the kids love her!
She’s one of the kindest and amazing people whose life has been both amazing and difficult. She’s full of positivity and fight, and I’m really proud to call her a friend. although she nearly got me killed trying to rescue her from a bull run she shouldn’t of done in Pamplona in the 90’s!!!
Then we have Sabrina and Damien, who are incredible individuals. You will not meet a more feisty, scary, and direct individual than Sabrina. But deep down, she’s a softie.
They are both working working within the field of equality and diversity and leading the way in getting organisations to think about this seriously. I’ve known Sabrinasince she was 11 and I’ve seen her Journey and struggles and achievements over the years and once again such a force of nature and good friend. I love seeing her for a good catch up and she has a very cool BMW M4!
Then we have Lorna (Dale’s wife) we met up in a Shisha bar and had sushi whilst watching the Portugal football match! And we laughed, jokedand talked a lot. I get recharged when I meet Lorna she’s one of life’s bright beacons.
So why was my motorbike parked in a school hall? This is the inspiration week at Falconhurst Primary School – setup by deputy head Matthew Nash. 20 inspiring professionals spend a day talking to the school leavers about their jobs and what it took to get there.
Pride of place for the motorbike which got huge amount of attention from the students, at least it was safe and wasn’t gonna get stolen off the street as it was in the school Hall.
The event that I was at was part of was inspirations week for 90 year six students. They had the opportunity to meet with 19 professionals from different careers, and spend the day talking to them and asking questions about how they got there. It was a really challenging day full of intense questions but we managed to meet all 90+ students individually and I talked about the Charity my life and the students were exceptional. We counted over 120 people sat on my motorbike getting photos after school with their parents, who knows they may be the future of motorbikes because of this experience?
Doing events like this is very different to a normal motorbike event at the same time really important as this will get our name out there, in the local papers, and school circles. I met teachers whose partners were bikers and the teaching assistant who was a biker herself and they have since joined our online group.
Of course going for a non-alcoholic drink with my friends after school was the icing on the cake.
As I finish the day, one of my girls sent me this picture of me proudly holding them and I thought back to Peter whose funeral we went to and I thought without a remarkable man like him none of this would’ve happened. Chance connections and meating the right people can really shape your life for the better.
And as I close this short article my thoughts go back to Peter and his wife Sue who now has to start navigating her life without a beloved husband. Thank you Peter for being such a good friend and inspirational person in my life. You’ve enabled me to have a life full of adventure, confidence and friends, you enabled and empowered me to thrive and make a difference for myself and others.
You will be missed wherever you are, please now take a rest knowing that your job is done and you did make a difference – and it was much bigger than you think – I was one of thousands of lives your magic touched x
Ten months ago, I hit a wall. As many of you know, the summer of 2025 was a period of profound struggle. Battling severe burnout, my decision-making was compromised, and my mental health reached a breaking point. I had to do the hardest thing imaginable: I had to stop doing something I loved and ask for help.
Me and my two grandsons
The Reality of the “Hole”…
Burnout is deceptive. You believe you’re “fine” right up until the moment you aren’t. When the collapse happens, the weight catches up instantly. The instinct is to withdraw—to crawl into a hole and switch off.
Without a support system, climbing out of that hole is really hard. Tragically, many don’t make it. We often view suicide as something that happens to “other” families, until it arrives at our own door. Research shows a single suicide profoundly affects an average of 123 people. That is nearly one million people every year entering a cycle of grief and unanswered questions.
It’s Not Rocket Science…
If 7,000 people were dying annually in plane crashes, there would be a national outcry. Suicide deserves that same urgency. Through six years of running our charity, I’ve learned that effective support isn’t “rocket science.” It starts with three simple principles:
Don’t judge.
Don’t laugh.
Don’t ignore.
Watch for the subtle shifts:
A disheveled appearance, a loss of interest, or sudden withdrawal. These are signals to step in. A simple phone call or an invitation for a walk costs nothing but time—yet that time is infinitely more valuable than the regret that follows a loss.
The Path to Recovery
At my lowest, I didn’t think I would ever function again. My mind was playing tricks on me; my body was failing. But once I asked for help, the burden began to lift.
Recovery is personal. For me, it was a combination of exercise, riding my motorbike, and reclaiming my sleep. Ironically, the very charity I founded became the safety net I personally needed.
A New Chapter:
Ambition and Action
I am incredibly proud to share that I have stepped into the role of CEO for our charity three days a week.
My ambition is clear: to grow this into the UK’s largest free dedicated support charity for the motorbike community.
We Can’t Do This Alone
In the coming months, I’ll be reaching out to discuss how you can play a role—as a supporter, sponsor, or partner. We can only reduce these statistics if we work together and invest resources and sincerity into this issue.
I want to thank my wife, Diane, for her unwavering perseverance. She helped me navigate my own imposter syndrome and see the logic in the impact we are making.
Remember: When life gets tough, we are here to listen, to support, and to ride.
It’s easy to dismiss online tools like Teams and Zoom as cold and impersonal. But if we pause and look at what they do, they truly enable, they are a low-cost game changers for delivering meaningful and positive mental health support.
I want to share two stories illustrating how we’ve embraced a hybrid approach to deepen community engagement and provide genuine assistance and long term support free of charge.
🏍️ Case Study 1: Mental Health Motorbike
When I talk about “hybrid” I mean combining online connection with real, in-person human interaction. It’s a simple formula, but the results can be powerful and very effective.
Mental Health Motorbike is a Charity set up to reduce suicide in the UK. We work with the industry, bike groups and individuals associated with the motorbike Community. When we launched our charity in March 2020, we were buzzing with excitement to hit the road and connect with this diverse community. Then, the UK entered a national lockdown due to COVID 19 – who would have anticipated this!! We faced a tough choice: put everything on hold, or find a creative way to meet bikers online? We settled on the latter, diving into the unknown world of Zoom (can you believe that was only five years ago?).
The rise of video conferencing such as Zoom, Teams, and other tools completely transformed remote working. While businesses saw huge cost savings (which frankly led to some employers exploiting employees’ – turning their homes into free office space and then expecting you to pay for everything is a separate mental health rant for another day!), for our charity, these tools offered something profoundly positive.
Finding Connection on the Screen
The Lockdown led to bikers missing the mental “headspace” a good motorcycle ride provides, bikers were struggling and even in the early days we soon started to realise just how important this Mental Health Charity for bikers would become. We started something called Virtual Ride Outs on Sunday evenings. Bikers could log in, talk bikes, and just be together. We hosted garage workshop projects, made meals together, held pop quizzes, and music nights. I remember one incredible night starting at 7 PM and finishing at 3:30 AM! It proved how vital talking and socialising truly are.
Today, with our trustees spread across the country, tools like Zoom, Slack, and Jotforms allow us to run the charity efficiently without constant travel. This efficiency keeps us lean, ensuring our funds go straight back into the community we serve. Plus, it makes those rare face-to-face meetings incredibly special—a reminder that we’re all proper human beings, not just little squares on a screen!
The Magic of Peer Support
While video calls are great, our text and photo based Facebook (members only) peer support group is the real star. Running 24 hours a day, with clear rules and skilled moderators, this text-based community (with a healthy use of emojis!) has been running for six years. We regularly hear from members who say this group literally kept them alive. With over 4,700 registered bikers, this group is nothing short of magical and is undoubtedly saving the NHS millions.
Our model works because it’s hybrid: we use the online support to connect, and then combine it with face-to-face meet-ups—over 400 events across the UK in 2025 alone! This combined approach brings support directly to where bikers are, creating a safety blanket they know is always there.
🌳 Case Study 2: The Friends of the Five Pits Trail group
We always encourage people we work with to give back to their community. Giving freely creates a completely different dynamic, often leading to unexpected and wonderful outcomes.
Five years ago, I was (no longer am lol) a self-proclaimed grumpy old man, constantly complaining about the litter on the nature trail behind my house. One day, a friend challenged me: “If you’re so unhappy, why don’t you clean it up?” So, I accepted the challenge (not realising the trail has over 25 miles of footpaths!).
From Litter Picking to Community Hub
I created a Facebook group to recruit local litter pickers. I was thrilled when we got 10 active people helping me. But then, something amazing happened: other local residents noticed the clean footpaths and liked what they saw. They started joining the movement. Five years on, this group is an incredible community of 7,500 local people.
While the trails sometimes see unwanted activity (like county lines drug runs on e-bikes, which are thankfully rare), the group has transformed itself into a vital community hub. It’s no longer just about litter; people share information about wildlife, nature, and local species. They post photos, organise fundraising for new benches and bird boxes (now hosting rare species!), and promote events like running clubs, horse riding meet-ups and foraging.
Positive Mental Health by Default
Because we’ve shown that litter doesn’t belong, people drop less of it, making the cleanup job easier over time. This small group is now providing a huge service, linking multiple villages and communities, offering a safe space to report incidents, and providing massive mental health benefits. Our community now has direct access to countryside rangers who are active in the group and quickly address issues like fly-tipping.
This group is fundamentally hybrid: members talk online, then meet up and use the trails, naturally boosting their positive mental health through physical activity and social connection in a safe and cared for space.
✅ The Bottom Line
These two distinct case studies, which rely solely on online tools and in-person connection, demonstrate the immense value of the hybrid model. Crucially, neither project receives any government funding, yet the long-term impact on reducing health needs is likely huge.
There are hundreds of groups like this across the UK, quietly providing invaluable services. We need to be much better at recognising and celebrating the creativity, dedication, and investment in ‘hybrid’ models and volunteer-led community groups. If you want to boost your own positive mental health, I wholeheartedly advocate for community engagement and volunteering. If you have any thoughts or similar projects post in comments below
PAPPA P with his little boy – this is one of the reasons why I need to look after myself better
I would like to thank all those people that contacted me after my previous blog post. I wanted to give you an update of where things are at with regards my own Mental Health and my phased return back to the Charity.
In hindsight the previous blog post was probably the hardest thing I’ve ever had to write as it meant looking inwards and taking responsibility but also acknowledging I might not be as strong as I thought I was.
One of our charity values is transparency and it would’ve been easy for me to brush this under the carpet and keep my situation to myself. But I know the feedback I’ve got has led to quite a lot of people realising that they also need to go and visit the doctor. So this alone validates my reasons for sharing so much and writing what was a risky post.
I consider myself somebody that’s spent a lot of time around poor Mental Health both professionally and personally and in many ways I should have been more tuned in to my own situation. But as I’ve talked about in the past, this stupid male conditioning kicks in and you tell yourself you are okay you will get through this you don’t need help, all the things that we are taught on the mental heath first aid training seem to go out of the window when it’s yourself you’re trying to manage. I would never tell somebody to ‘man up’ or ‘get a grip’ but my inner voice kept saying this subconsciously to me and this is why it took me so long to get professional help. But during that delay time things were deteriorating quite badly.
This experience has really highlighted how important our charity is – particularly when you are being let down by other professional services. We provide a platform for people to talk in a non judgmental space, we won’t laugh at you or ignore you. When I look back to how I have been supported over the last 3 months, my friends from the Charity have really carried me through this difficult period and I would like to thank them once again (and my family) for helping me understand how poorly I have been.
Taking stock of things I realise it’s still have a long way to go in understanding my own mental health but I’ve realised how damaging burnout can be. Anybody that knows me will know how this Charity goes to the core of who I am and for me to get to the stage where I wanted to walk away showed something was obviously wrong. It’s not until you completely stop that you can start to see a clearer picture of what was wrong. When you’re in the thick of it so much is missed. I was burnt out after 5 very intense years creating a national charity from scratch and this burnout had a detrimental effect on my confidence and self-esteem.
Over the next few weeks I’m working with the charity trustees to look at a phased return back to work. This will start with me attending four days at Motorcycle Live and then hopefully meeting with all of our incredible Regional Coordinators and team before Christmas.
It makes my heart full of pride to see we will be at 1100 Mental Health first aid trained by Christmas. But more importantly when we look at the data we have done something in the region of 400 face-to-face events using the skills of these mental health first aiders and allowing them to put theory into practice – we take the support directly to places bikers hang out and make talking very accessible.
Something like this doesn’t just happen overnight it happens because of some very special people. Volunteers that understand the charity’s vision and resonate with it. It has meant them giving up much of their weekends to meet with and look after fellow bikers. And for me I have the upmost respect for every one of our volunteers that has done this, it is heartwarming, as I’ve been a direct beneficiary of this Support.
Poor Mental Health is that silent killer which affects far more people than you might realise. So just a few little … If you notice one of your friends or family member seems to be behaving differently or is a little subdued or dishevelled, make a cup of tea and ask them are you okay? You may need to dig a little bit to get the truth. Also give yourself some time to deal with the fact they might not be okay and will need some help. This could be a life-saving intervention. The Mental Health first aid training we deliver will give you the confidence and toolkit to do this (www.mhmotorbike.com/mhfa) and we would welcome you into our network.
I am not going to rush into doing what I did previously, I’m going to try and get a much better work life balance and be more focussed , but after lots of soul searching I still see my future with the Charity and hopefully helping to drive the team to do what we are doing better. It’s taking a lot of time for me to work out next steps, but my journey with this incredible charity is not over.
I will leave you with a few words of wisdom…
First of all great acts of kindness are made up of many smaller deeds. As we care for others we are also working on ourselves; every act, every word, every gesture of genuine compassion naturally nourishes our own hearts and in my experience this will make you a more fulfilled person. Caring for others will make this complicated world more bearable and something we should all do.
“Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.”
It’s probably worth starting this post is a long one with a trigger alert as some of the topics discussed cover suicide and depression.
To say the Summer of 2025 has been unusual would be an understatement. I didn’t go into it thinking it would be as challenging as it has been. I got to my 56th birthday and something very strange happened. I woke up and thought what am I doing? why am I doing this? and I started to doubt everything I’ve learnt about myself over the last 56 years. My confidence and self-esteem had completely deserted me. My Mental Health has always been a little bit up-and-down, I tend to be the emotional one of the three brothers, I’m not as laid back and I enjoy doing things that are not necessarily straightforward. I don’t know where this comes from it’s certainly not from my dad, he is very straightforward and likes things to be simple.
To try and set some context to this post it is worth hearing a bit of my history and where the charity came from. I’ve always enjoyed spending time with different cultures and interesting people so most of my life I’ve enjoyed travelling the world and over the last 25 years much of this has been international through my work. Brexit sadly put a stop to this as a career as we lost the mechanism to secure international contracts through the European Union Erasmus plus programme. My company had been involved in over 250 life changing projects with young people and to say this was life changing for all of us involved would be an understatement. This work gave me a real understanding of job satisfaction, making a difference and shaping young lives so that they could aspire to be something different. There is a book to be written about some of the young people we’ve worked with and what they have gone onto achieve because of these projects. But that is for another day.
I think I started to understand poor Mental Health in 2019 when many negative things collided – Brexit, a changing job situation, exhaustion and the loss of a friend Dale Caffrey to suicide. I remember going to Dale’s funeral and making a simple promise to Dale’s family and friend (Jay Lucas) that I would do something to prevent other families going through the heartache of suicide. Jay who is the other official founder of Mental Health Motorbike said I will do this with you Paul. October 2019 a seed was sown.
Shortly after the funeral I presented the idea of working with the motorbike community to Jay and he said I trust your judgement I will help you create this. And we started planning. We spent about three months researching what this should look like, talking to bikers we asked one simple question “Do you think there is an appetite for a dedicated Mental Health Charity working with bikers?” And we asked many people this question and overwhelmingly the answer was yes, but make sure it is a group that isn’t just for male bikers but open to all.
On the 1st of March 2020 we launched Mental Health Motorbike. And we started to train bikers in Mental Health first aid. Andy Elwood who was one of the previous trustees (and another key person) took a lead on driving the Mental Health first aid training forward. We started to bring a number of trustees on board, Andy, Mark JJ Johnson, Ken Finlayson and the aim was to become a registered charity as soon as possible. This happened on the 4th November 2021. I was so proud of the team when we received our official Charity number. It had taken blood sweat and tears for us to get to this stage.
We had never taken a conventional approach on how the charity was funded. Most charities would go down the grant funding route but this makes them a little bit more vulnerable as when this funding dries up, the charity starts to struggle.
A few years previously I’d been working over in Amsterdam on a very inspirational international project (Digg-Out) it was founded by a good friend called Nanette De Jong-Becker. The project was working with street prostitutes and young homeless autistic people. Nanette became a very good friend but she’d always said if you set up a charity don’t rely on Grant funding, find the useful people who can give you pro bono support and utilise this as it will save you thousands and have real community impact. When we set the Charity we looked at this model and we started to talk to the industry, to bike groups, to road safety partnerships and when we needed something we asked for support rather than financial contributions. Nanette’s model of working was really introduced early on with our Charity and it’s meant that we’ve never run out of money and we really utilise the support and caring nature within the motorbike community. It also allows others not necessarily involved with the day-to-day operation of Mental Health Motorbike to have an input. We owe Nanette a great deal in giving us the confidence to look at this as a different type of approach.
The problem with setting up a charity that comes from a very personal place means that you are completely invested. What it doesn’t take into account is just how much this investment will take out of you. Looking back over the last five years I cannot begin to imagine the hours I’ve put into this Charity and how much of my time it has taken me away from my family. I have a very supportive and loving family and they have been incredibly proud of what I’ve set up, but I’m sure at times they have really got fed up of her hearing the words ‘Mental Health Motorbike’. They are obviously much too nice to say this to me but I’m sure deep down they’ve probably felt it from time to time. As external observers looking in they have seen the impact the Charity has had on so many. They hear the stories, they read the social media posts and they see the growth of the Charity and for me it feels very very special to be able to share this with them and I know they are all very proud of me.
But there is always a dark side to being so invested. It is something that gradually creeps up on you and this is what I experienced shortly after my 56th birthday when I woke up and started to question everything. This went very deep to my whole existence of why am I here. I didn’t feel as though I should be here and I couldn’t work out what was going on. I found myself in a world of pain wasn’t quite physical but it was making me feel really ill. I didn’t know what to do. So I just stopped doing the thing that had consumed me for five years and that was the Charity and caring for others. This hurt so much, in the blink of an eye I had just fallen out of love with something that I cared about greatly. I certainly felt very lost and angry and alone. Everything went very dark and I didn’t want to see anyone except my family.
I knew things were bad because the one place I’ve been avoiding going was the doctors but I realised I needed to go and talk about what was happening to me. So I tried to get an appointment it took about six weeks of trying to fill out the online forms and getting nowhere. Eventually walked into my local village doctor was humiliated by the receptionist. Despite being in floods of tears asking for help I ended up walking out without that help – despite being distressed not a single person stepped up to offer me any help. This was me at my lowest walking down a local nature trail in floods of tears thinking what next? I don’t know what to do. At this stage I was desperate and wanted to hurt myself, or do something to stop the pain. All I could think about was my beautiful daughter and her fast approaching wedding, I knew I was safe from actually harming myself because I wouldn’t do anything to jeopardise her special day – again I dread to think where I would’ve been if I’d not got the love of my family. I can also see how things escalate very quickly in the moment.
As I walked went online and I found the complaints procedure for the medical health group of my doctors and wrote a very emotional letter of complaint and sent it to them. This triggered a quick reaction and suddenly the doctors couldn’t do enough for me. I think it was because they realised I was the founder of a national Mental Health Charity. This made me a little bit frustrated and angry and something I will pick up with them at a later date. However I got in front of a very caring doctor and it was probably the most difficult appointment I’ve ever had as i has just cried for 20 minutes, not making any sense. I really felt for the student doctor that was there observing this! Dr Taylor was very patient despite my initial resistance, he gave me medication to get this under control. He also arranged another appointment for the following week. At this stage I’d started taking the tablets and my emotions were a little bit more in check and we sat and talked about feelings at this second appointment, he listened and cared and this was so important. He obviously checked into the charity and talked about the amazing work we we’re doing. He said he needed to get me well so I could continue doing this incredible work.
I’m sat here writing this post four weeks later I’m looking back I think without this professional medical intervention I don’t know where I would be. In fact I’m scared to think what would’ve happened without it. I think I am very typical of men of my age, stubborn, find it hard to talk about personal feelings, we have this belief it will just go away. So reaching out is probably one of the more difficult things men find. It doesn’t help when you’re treated badly by a receptionist. But reaching out can be life saving. We have to make this process easier and charity’s like ours are an important conduit for helping with this.
I know the road recovery is not going to be straightforward as the last few days I’ve had a complete relapse and I’m struggling again. But at least I have a plan and people are aware of what I’m dealing with. Please remember others aren’t mind readers and as a species we are very good at masking and hiding things – so sometimes telling people straight – I am not very well can really help with your recovery. It has been very hard to tell people just how bad things are. Strangely I don’t feel less of a man for doing this.
I’m writing this blog post with I hope that other men (and women) might resonate with it and it might give them the confidence to reach out for help. I believe the initial step od asking for it is the hardest.
Moving forward I still think it’s too early to make a decision about where the Charity fits in my future. But it’s worth mentioning how many people have reached out from this Charity and given me proper meaningful support and words of encouragement. I cannot thank them enough and I want to say a special thank you too all my friends (you know who you are), my family. But most importantly to an incredible man Weeble who has been there for me daily.
Please if you’re reading this and struggling find those people to talk to, no matter how hard it is it does get easier the more that you open up.
The charity has been one of my life’s biggest and proudest achievements and navigating the professional medical minefield has made me realise just how important it is for so many. I truly hope I can rediscover the love that I’ve always had for this incredible charity and the people that run it but I know this will hopefully come back in time as I work on myself. Once again thank you for being there and caring
