Having a rest after the 2026 Relay Riders final leg from Ladybower Reservoir
In 2019 I had a moment of madness, I’d lost a friend suicide, and I made one of the biggest promises of my life at his funeral. To stop other families going through the pain of suicide by doing something to stop this.
At that moment in time I didn’t know what that something would be, so what does a biker do? they take a very big risk and buy another motorbike to achieve this. I didn’t think it through and I saw a random BMW which was a very high specification on eBay (we all know we don’t take random punts on bikes five hours away from where you live on eBay). This was probably worth about £14,000 so I made a speculative offer of £10,000 and shortly afterwards I got a message from the owner saying if I could come and pick it up and sort it quickly I can have it. Immediately the alarm bells started ringing so I did a deep dig into the history of the bike and doing a few online checks – everything seem legit. So I took a very big gamble and use some family savings to buy it!
I told my wife I’ve just bought the ‘chariot of good hope’ hoping using a bit of confusing words she wouldn’t go crazy at me for spending some of the family savings. I told her I was going to set a Charity up in Dale’s name, she didn’t bat an eyelid.
30 litre tank – less stops at the garage! Bonus
Money has never really meant much to Diane. She just thought it was another one of my crazy ideas – in our time together there’s been a lot of those. Ranging from me buying a expensive complete 7 camera mobile film and tv station (this ended up being central to my career and was a good buy) through to crazy sound and lighting systems for the nightclub in the conservatory for my girls parties.
Anyway I digress… I suddenly own a bike five hours away so I bought a one-way train ticket, put my bike gear on and headed down south. The guy that I bought the bike from picked me up at the train station in a very cool custom van! Drove me to a big house and made me a cup of tea. He was obviously a very wealthy builder. I went into the garage where the BMW R1200 GS adventure was sat – a little forlorn looking surrounded by junk in a corner of his garage. It was overshadowed by very shiny KTM’s and other bikes. He told me he’d bought the BMW for a few long distance holidays down to Italy and France with his friends and they also had had a trip to the Isle of Man. This was the sole extent of the 4000 miles on the clock. I asked what was wrong with the bike and he said absolutely nothing it was just too big and he preferred the KTM’s.
I was still very nervous and when I looked at the bike – there appeared to be nothing at all wrong with it – it was mint. I thought to myself I’ve got a five hour drive I’m going to find out if there is a problem! I said my goodbyes and rode a GS for the first time. It had a different feel to all the other bike’s I’ve ever ridden! And this was a little bit unsettling to start with. A unique telelever system, but I had five hours to try and work it out. First step… a garage to fill up with fuel. I realised the tank was huge it held 30L and this was the biggest tank on a bike I’ve ever seen. But it also meant I could ride all the way home on one tank which I really enjoyed. The technology on a BMW is incredible! There were different engine modes, complex traction control and braking. Different comfort modes, heated devices. A geeks and gadget persons dream.
But my favourite was the satellite navigation and Wonder Wheel, for those that have never seen this it is a wheel on the left left-hand side of the handlebar grip which works as a joystick to control the TFT and navigation. As somebody that has always loved technology I was in my element. I found a layby and I probably spent over an hour just reading the booklet and finding out what gadgets were on board. I was starting to really love this bike already.
Even the non bikers love it, here my friends Sabrina (a friend of Dale’s) and husband Damian testing the comfort levels
It takes a bit of getting used to because stationary it is a big lump to roll around, but what really blew me away was once you were moving 5 miles an hour or more it becomes weightless, and so easy to manoeuvre, the turning circle is incredible, as long as you’ve got good low speed balance this bike is an absolute dream. After the first two hours of riding I was starting to really really like this bike, I didn’t get the usual wrist problems that my previous Hondas gave me, the seat was really comfortable and long distance with the cruise control on it was a dream to ride.
I’ve eventually got home made myself a cup of tea showed it off to the wife and said I’m off out again! I couldn’t get enough of it. I’d never been so focused on a bike and I knew at this stage this bike would play a very pivotal port in setting up the new Charity. But I was still one man and his dog in a garage wanting to change the world – but already what made this difference was now I had a super cool BMW bike to do this with. I’d bought the bike to change the world and now I needed a plan.
At an interview for the BBC one of the presenters
Before this happened I still had a few niggling doubts about the bike being genuine and fit for purpose – I was still unsure why I had got this bike at such a low price. When I asked the guy why he was prepared to sell it he said he just wanted it out of the way. There was no bartering he just told me I was lucky to get it at such a good price and we left it at that.
I found a local garage in Chesterfield SD Motorcycles and met the amazing Dave Ball for the first time. I told him I wanted a full service on the bike and for them to do a thorough check on it see whether I’ve got a duffer. The five hour drive had been faultless so I knew it wasn’t mechanically unsound. When I met Dave we sat and had a cuppa together for the first time and he started quizzing me why I bought the bike and what I wanted to do with it. I told him about my plans for the Charity – a dedicated Mental Health Support Charity for the motorbike community. This really peaked his interest, we chatted for awhile had a few laughs and he said have you got five minutes I just need to talk to somebody. Off he went about 30 minutes later he still hadn’t arrived back and I was starting to get a bit nervous what to do! Eventually he arrive back and said he’s been speaking to his co director Sean and they decided they thought this was a fabulous idea. They gave me an offer which simply blew me away. Bearing in mind I’d only just met this guy but he was offering to maintain and service the bike free of charge and keep it on the road (for the Charity I am about to set up). The only thing is I’ve got to do this and make it work! I think it was the loss of Dale, and such blind faith and trusting me that made me very emotional at this stage. Dave and Sean at SD Motorcycles had suddenly become our first sponsor! They will never understand just how much that offer led to me setting up a national Charity. Their blind trust in a stranger was both heartwarming and motivating. Without SD Motorcycles the Charity would not have had the drive to do what we set out to do. I really owe those guys so much and the incredible Support has led to so many Live’s been saved. and what the most heartwarming thing in this part of the story is – as they have never asked for anything, no PR, just a selfless commitment to a random stranger! They are true heroes.
Anyway going back to the bike the first thing I did was create some random design to make the back stand out as the *OFFICIAL* flagship Charity bike.
One of the many pit stops on the way to an event
I started the Charity with an idea and very quickly Dale’s school friend Jay Lucas came on board, and he was the second person that really made the Charity happen. He was an innovator for autoglym so was very skilled at taking an idea/concept through to market. The planning and design of the Charity’s look was very much down to Jay. He was very good at this.
We created a brand that we were happy with and this allowed me to work on some designs to get the aluminium boxes wrapped, and make the motorbike stand out. I remember speaking to a friend who offered to wrap the boxes for me, he had his own sign and print company, and together we got the ideas together and I dropped the boxes off. He did a great job and now six years on they are still looking amazing. He did tell me that he would never do it again because those boxes and rivet holes and brackets and latches caused him such a headache!!
I don’t know whether you’ve ever driven a BMW R1200 GS adventure with the large aluminium boxes on! But they do have a striking presence and despite every other bike being like this this one stood out! From day one I’ve always had a lot of people discuss the bike and talk to me about the Charity because of it. It is the ultimate promotion vehicle. I often see people when I’m driving at the side of them with their cameras photographing the website address and contacting us saying they’ve seen us on the road. So I never take the panniers off. This makes for an interesting experience when filtering, and it times it can be tight, but it’s also exhilarating.
At one of our many wellbeing hubs
The amount of mental health support I have given at the side of the bike when I’ve left it somewhere and somebody has been waiting to have a chat with me, it is remarkable. But the more I think about this the more we need a Fleet of these bikes out there just randomly allowing people to gravitate towards them and ask for help. This is now part of our 10 year plan
My bike is now 11 years old and despite being a fabulous and like new still, it will be soon time to upgrade. I’ve thought about this long and hard and I’ve decided I do not ever want to get rid of this bike as it has been a life-saving vehicle, with such a story to tell. It has been to hundreds of events, it is a bike with presence and integrity. We do what it says on the can or in this case the panniers, we meet people to help save their lives in a very complex and discreet way. We get people talking – this year our national team will do over 500 face-to-face events. Our network of 1300 trained Mental Health first aiders are the backbone to our incredible work
40,000 miles later
Over the years we have worked with tens of thousands of bikers. I often wonder what the journey would’ve been like without the BMW? I wouldn’t have wanted to do the miles that I have covered, in all weathers, and that bike has been my companion. there is a number of very personal stories associated with the bike and every significant loss the person is reflected on the bike and stays with me as I go out to do the work of the Charity.
This year I have to go and meet the King to pick up and OBE and there is nothing more I want to do than receive it on the motorbike, because the bike is the true hero in this story! It is the Swiss Army knife of bikes, and is so versatile at what it does, rock solid, dependable and always puts a smile on your face!
The new bike will be a BMW, it will be a 1300 GS adventure. But this time the wrap will be done professionally. It will have sponsor and Charity information that stands out and invites people to come over and talk. It will be the flagship bike that I as CEO and Founder will ride to events proudly .
But there are the two issues we have… firstly how we make this happen! And secondly how can any other bike live up to the reputation of this first one? I don’t want to be disappointed and move onto bike that less impressive, because the first thing I will want to do is go back to my much loved original.
BMW there’s a lot at stake here, I do hope the 1300 GS adventure isn’t a disappointment when I take it out for a test drive! I want to feel the connection and magic as the BMW story continues with us… watch is this space as this story develops….
Redefining what your Office space looks like in 2026
My current space
I always said that I didn’t want to get stuck behind a computer doing my job. Having done this for the last five months I’ve worked to out different creative ways of managing this. Technology now means that you don’t have to be desk bound. I tend to save a lot of my informal telephone calls for when I’m out walking. A good set of noise cancelling headphones and some quiet trails to walk down can be a really refreshing place to catch up with people. I find I get a lot less stressed when I’m talking to people when I’m outdoors.
Those meetings that involved long drives to have a planning meeting can be so much more productive when you agree to meet halfway at a neutral venue, and you use the motorbike to get you there.
I’m also starting to really enjoy online video calls. A few months ago I introduced 15 minute online cuppa and chat meetings with our regional coordinators. Five minutes for the Person to explain what’s going on, five minutes for me to respond to those issues and five minutes to catch up on all the other stuff. Sometimes they go over but it’s nice to keep them short and sweet and more frequent.
I also think speaking to the younger generation that have grown up around technology to see how they’re embracing it can very often create interesting new ideas.
I’ve also found moving my Office environment around the house can bring a different level of productivity. I’m probably quite lucky that I’ve got the space to do this now the children don’t live at home. It’s also fascinating how paperless have become. I remember 20/30 years ago your office became focused around the filing cabinet, photocopier, the printer and your team. All devices that have seen a huge decline in recent sales as we just don’t use them anymore.
It was also thinking about when you have a high-level online meeting how the clothes that you wear has changed. Previously I may have chose to wear trousers shirt and a tie, but I don’t think I’ve ever done that on an online meeting.
I sometimes look back with a sense of nostalgia about how great a vibrant Office space was, conversing with colleagues, admin staff and delivery people. And in some ways we have lost a real sense of social support as many people are now working in isolation from their homes. This can bring its own set of Mental Health challenges.
I think for me combining the outdoors and the indoors really works. But defining my Office is very much an evolving process.
So what does your Office look like? I’d be fascinated to know how things have changed for you?
It’s been a very challenging few weeks both personally and professionally. I am being very mindful about managing this so I don’t sink again.
It is also the one year anniversary of the time that my Mental Health really started to play up. Looking back I’m very proud I acted on my Mental Health first aid training, engaging family,friends I trusted to do something about it.
As I’ve mentioned on a previous blog post I experienced burnout, this took over six months to form a plan to get myself well again. It involved interactions with doctors, my charity, family and friends.
But it’s not until a recent post on our Peer Support group that I started thinking about what a support network actually is. I always assumed it was related directly with people, and the post made me really question what effective support looks like?
The more I thought about it the more I realised it didn’t always have to be about having human support. I spend a lot of time outdoors interacting with nature on my own. When you start looking closer there are lots of ways to get help from the outdoors and what is around you. But first of all you need to identify places that you are comfortable being in. Over the last few weeks I’ve been fascinated by bees, the way that they work together to survive and produce one of the most remarkable things which is honey. There is some incredible YouTube content out there but you can dig deep into this. Then actually going out and watching them function is fascinating. I had to reassure my wife that I wasn’t going to get a beehive in the garden! But seriously these are remarkable creatures and we just take them for granted.
I put together this little video whilst there was sat reflecting and it might be of use to somebody. I think sometimes spending time exploring these things can actually open up different levels of support for you.
What is a support network?
Seven years ago I started a small litter picking group to cover the nature trails behind my house. The more I did this the more I saw the benefits of it, I created a Facebook group and I realise that I wasn’t the only one out there that appreciated the way that the nature trails supported our mental health. This is now grown into a community of nearly 8000 people, all appreciating what’s on their doorstep. The group has created a place of safety for many, a place where horse riders can talk with runners, parents can talk with each other and sadly local county line drug dealers can use it to avoid the police! A support network has been created for me out of nothing, through this I can use the environment, people I meet, the changing weather, just to share beauty as a way of recharging my batteries. It is a place of safety where I can exercise, observe, question and reflect – a very important support network outdoors.
I’d like to encourage you to think about what your support networks are and whether for you they are provided by other people or something else.
I’d love to hear you thoughts on this. Post in comments if you want to share.
I’ve been swamped with meetings, funerals and events for the past few days. It’s rather striking when you consider how much of our lives is shaped by the people we meet, but also just how hard saying goodbye is.
This is Peter Payne, a man who has been a significant part of my life for many years… and sadly, he passed away a few weeks ago.
Peter was such a fantastic boss and later became a wonderful friend. He and his wife Sue were truly legends in Youth Work in Buckinghamshire and then Milton Keynes. I stayed working with Peter for many years because he really helped me shine as a Youth worker. Even when I moved on we started a charity for Romanian orphans in the early nineties together, which led to him visiting Romania many times with me and the team. It was remarkable we never had any cross words just kind encouragement and professional leadership.
The Youth Project I worked in was a challenging one on a London overspill estate and this is where I met Dale Caffrey, who became an inspiration for us to set up our charity. My co-founder Jay Lucas was Dale’s friend.
Jay is a really good friend now. Without him, the charity would not have started. After Dale’s suicide and funeral where I made the promise to do something to stop other families going through the pain of suicide, we met together, and we researched and came up with the idea and plan for Mental Health Motorbike. We both invested so much time into coming up with a plan that would be achievable and needed. I’ve known Jay since he was a little boy, and now he’s living in Portugal with his wife Charlotte, and they are again doing amazing work out there.
So who else did I meet … first of all, Kelly, what an awesome individual. Again, school friends with Jay and Dale. Now working at Falconhurst School looking after the SEN children. The room lights up when you meet Kelly and the kids love her!
She’s one of the kindest and amazing people whose life has been both amazing and difficult. She’s full of positivity and fight, and I’m really proud to call her a friend. although she nearly got me killed trying to rescue her from a bull run she shouldn’t of done in Pamplona in the 90’s!!!
Then we have Sabrina and Damien, who are incredible individuals. You will not meet a more feisty, scary, and direct individual than Sabrina. But deep down, she’s a softie.
They are both working working within the field of equality and diversity and leading the way in getting organisations to think about this seriously. I’ve known Sabrinasince she was 11 and I’ve seen her Journey and struggles and achievements over the years and once again such a force of nature and good friend. I love seeing her for a good catch up and she has a very cool BMW M4!
Then we have Lorna (Dale’s wife) we met up in a Shisha bar and had sushi whilst watching the Portugal football match! And we laughed, jokedand talked a lot. I get recharged when I meet Lorna she’s one of life’s bright beacons.
So why was my motorbike parked in a school hall? This is the inspiration week at Falconhurst Primary School – setup by deputy head Matthew Nash. 20 inspiring professionals spend a day talking to the school leavers about their jobs and what it took to get there.
Pride of place for the motorbike which got huge amount of attention from the students, at least it was safe and wasn’t gonna get stolen off the street as it was in the school Hall.
The event that I was at was part of was inspirations week for 90 year six students. They had the opportunity to meet with 19 professionals from different careers, and spend the day talking to them and asking questions about how they got there. It was a really challenging day full of intense questions but we managed to meet all 90+ students individually and I talked about the Charity my life and the students were exceptional. We counted over 120 people sat on my motorbike getting photos after school with their parents, who knows they may be the future of motorbikes because of this experience?
Doing events like this is very different to a normal motorbike event at the same time really important as this will get our name out there, in the local papers, and school circles. I met teachers whose partners were bikers and the teaching assistant who was a biker herself and they have since joined our online group.
Of course going for a non-alcoholic drink with my friends after school was the icing on the cake.
As I finish the day, one of my girls sent me this picture of me proudly holding them and I thought back to Peter whose funeral we went to and I thought without a remarkable man like him none of this would’ve happened. Chance connections and meating the right people can really shape your life for the better.
And as I close this short article my thoughts go back to Peter and his wife Sue who now has to start navigating her life without a beloved husband. Thank you Peter for being such a good friend and inspirational person in my life. You’ve enabled me to have a life full of adventure, confidence and friends, you enabled and empowered me to thrive and make a difference for myself and others.
You will be missed wherever you are, please now take a rest knowing that your job is done and you did make a difference – and it was much bigger than you think – I was one of thousands of lives your magic touched x
Ten months ago, I hit a wall. As many of you know, the summer of 2025 was a period of profound struggle. Battling severe burnout, my decision-making was compromised, and my mental health reached a breaking point. I had to do the hardest thing imaginable: I had to stop doing something I loved and ask for help.
Me and my two grandsons
The Reality of the “Hole”…
Burnout is deceptive. You believe you’re “fine” right up until the moment you aren’t. When the collapse happens, the weight catches up instantly. The instinct is to withdraw—to crawl into a hole and switch off.
Without a support system, climbing out of that hole is really hard. Tragically, many don’t make it. We often view suicide as something that happens to “other” families, until it arrives at our own door. Research shows a single suicide profoundly affects an average of 123 people. That is nearly one million people every year entering a cycle of grief and unanswered questions.
It’s Not Rocket Science…
If 7,000 people were dying annually in plane crashes, there would be a national outcry. Suicide deserves that same urgency. Through six years of running our charity, I’ve learned that effective support isn’t “rocket science.” It starts with three simple principles:
Don’t judge.
Don’t laugh.
Don’t ignore.
Watch for the subtle shifts:
A disheveled appearance, a loss of interest, or sudden withdrawal. These are signals to step in. A simple phone call or an invitation for a walk costs nothing but time—yet that time is infinitely more valuable than the regret that follows a loss.
The Path to Recovery
At my lowest, I didn’t think I would ever function again. My mind was playing tricks on me; my body was failing. But once I asked for help, the burden began to lift.
Recovery is personal. For me, it was a combination of exercise, riding my motorbike, and reclaiming my sleep. Ironically, the very charity I founded became the safety net I personally needed.
A New Chapter:
Ambition and Action
I am incredibly proud to share that I have stepped into the role of CEO for our charity three days a week.
My ambition is clear: to grow this into the UK’s largest free dedicated support charity for the motorbike community.
We Can’t Do This Alone
In the coming months, I’ll be reaching out to discuss how you can play a role—as a supporter, sponsor, or partner. We can only reduce these statistics if we work together and invest resources and sincerity into this issue.
I want to thank my wife, Diane, for her unwavering perseverance. She helped me navigate my own imposter syndrome and see the logic in the impact we are making.
Remember: When life gets tough, we are here to listen, to support, and to ride.
It’s easy to dismiss online tools like Teams and Zoom as cold and impersonal. But if we pause and look at what they do, they truly enable, they are a low-cost game changers for delivering meaningful and positive mental health support.
I want to share two stories illustrating how we’ve embraced a hybrid approach to deepen community engagement and provide genuine assistance and long term support free of charge.
🏍️ Case Study 1: Mental Health Motorbike
When I talk about “hybrid” I mean combining online connection with real, in-person human interaction. It’s a simple formula, but the results can be powerful and very effective.
Mental Health Motorbike is a Charity set up to reduce suicide in the UK. We work with the industry, bike groups and individuals associated with the motorbike Community. When we launched our charity in March 2020, we were buzzing with excitement to hit the road and connect with this diverse community. Then, the UK entered a national lockdown due to COVID 19 – who would have anticipated this!! We faced a tough choice: put everything on hold, or find a creative way to meet bikers online? We settled on the latter, diving into the unknown world of Zoom (can you believe that was only five years ago?).
The rise of video conferencing such as Zoom, Teams, and other tools completely transformed remote working. While businesses saw huge cost savings (which frankly led to some employers exploiting employees’ – turning their homes into free office space and then expecting you to pay for everything is a separate mental health rant for another day!), for our charity, these tools offered something profoundly positive.
Finding Connection on the Screen
The Lockdown led to bikers missing the mental “headspace” a good motorcycle ride provides, bikers were struggling and even in the early days we soon started to realise just how important this Mental Health Charity for bikers would become. We started something called Virtual Ride Outs on Sunday evenings. Bikers could log in, talk bikes, and just be together. We hosted garage workshop projects, made meals together, held pop quizzes, and music nights. I remember one incredible night starting at 7 PM and finishing at 3:30 AM! It proved how vital talking and socialising truly are.
Today, with our trustees spread across the country, tools like Zoom, Slack, and Jotforms allow us to run the charity efficiently without constant travel. This efficiency keeps us lean, ensuring our funds go straight back into the community we serve. Plus, it makes those rare face-to-face meetings incredibly special—a reminder that we’re all proper human beings, not just little squares on a screen!
The Magic of Peer Support
While video calls are great, our text and photo based Facebook (members only) peer support group is the real star. Running 24 hours a day, with clear rules and skilled moderators, this text-based community (with a healthy use of emojis!) has been running for six years. We regularly hear from members who say this group literally kept them alive. With over 4,700 registered bikers, this group is nothing short of magical and is undoubtedly saving the NHS millions.
Our model works because it’s hybrid: we use the online support to connect, and then combine it with face-to-face meet-ups—over 400 events across the UK in 2025 alone! This combined approach brings support directly to where bikers are, creating a safety blanket they know is always there.
🌳 Case Study 2: The Friends of the Five Pits Trail group
We always encourage people we work with to give back to their community. Giving freely creates a completely different dynamic, often leading to unexpected and wonderful outcomes.
Five years ago, I was (no longer am lol) a self-proclaimed grumpy old man, constantly complaining about the litter on the nature trail behind my house. One day, a friend challenged me: “If you’re so unhappy, why don’t you clean it up?” So, I accepted the challenge (not realising the trail has over 25 miles of footpaths!).
From Litter Picking to Community Hub
I created a Facebook group to recruit local litter pickers. I was thrilled when we got 10 active people helping me. But then, something amazing happened: other local residents noticed the clean footpaths and liked what they saw. They started joining the movement. Five years on, this group is an incredible community of 7,500 local people.
While the trails sometimes see unwanted activity (like county lines drug runs on e-bikes, which are thankfully rare), the group has transformed itself into a vital community hub. It’s no longer just about litter; people share information about wildlife, nature, and local species. They post photos, organise fundraising for new benches and bird boxes (now hosting rare species!), and promote events like running clubs, horse riding meet-ups and foraging.
Positive Mental Health by Default
Because we’ve shown that litter doesn’t belong, people drop less of it, making the cleanup job easier over time. This small group is now providing a huge service, linking multiple villages and communities, offering a safe space to report incidents, and providing massive mental health benefits. Our community now has direct access to countryside rangers who are active in the group and quickly address issues like fly-tipping.
This group is fundamentally hybrid: members talk online, then meet up and use the trails, naturally boosting their positive mental health through physical activity and social connection in a safe and cared for space.
✅ The Bottom Line
These two distinct case studies, which rely solely on online tools and in-person connection, demonstrate the immense value of the hybrid model. Crucially, neither project receives any government funding, yet the long-term impact on reducing health needs is likely huge.
There are hundreds of groups like this across the UK, quietly providing invaluable services. We need to be much better at recognising and celebrating the creativity, dedication, and investment in ‘hybrid’ models and volunteer-led community groups. If you want to boost your own positive mental health, I wholeheartedly advocate for community engagement and volunteering. If you have any thoughts or similar projects post in comments below
